


get used to it

by summerandmazes13



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, But It's Not That Big of a Deal lol, Foster Child Lucas, High School, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining Elliot, Rich Kid Elliot, Romance, Trigger Warning - Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:34:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25122493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/summerandmazes13/pseuds/summerandmazes13
Summary: Eliott was born to fall in love. He falls in love with music, with art, with animals, with clothes. He cares so much and his heart is full of how much admiration he holds for the world. There’s so much beauty in everything. But Lucas. Lucas is the accumulation of the most alluring songs, the most dazzling art, the most fascinating animals and the most exquisite clothing. He’s the stars in the night sky and flowers in the fields, he’s magnetic and alluring and absolutely, absolutely lovely. He makes Eliott feel things he’s never felt before. So, he thinks that justifies the rush. Eliott isn’t cocky but he’s never been more confident of anything ever before in his life.-or, the one where Elliot is an innocent rich high school boy that wants to protect foster child Lucas from all the evil in the world.
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Comments: 22
Kudos: 158





	get used to it

**Author's Note:**

> My first finished Elu fic! And definitely not my best but I can't wait to improve from here. I hope you all enjoy, please feel free to comment :) (The title is inspired by my favorite song right now, "Get Used to It" by Ricky Montgomery. Please please give it a listen, it's an AMAZING song. And hopefully you'll see how it fits, the same way I do!)

High school parties had scared the shit out of him ever since he and Arthur had watched Project X in Mrs. Wilderberry's classroom back in seventh grade.

However, Daphne is holding out the crisply laminated 'Halloween Bash' invitation towards him in the hallway right outside the math classroom and it doesn't look like she's willing to take no for an answer. 

"Listen," Eliott starts, to which he's automatically interrupted.

"There's gonna be alcohol, drugs, and sex." She gives him an impatient look. "Since you're a teenage boy, I automatically know you like at least one of those things." Daphne folds the invitation and slips it into the front pocket of Eliott’s jeans. He does nothing to stop her.

"See you there," she calls without looking back, already taking off on a brisk walk towards Yann Cazas, who will most definitely fall to the same fate he had just encountered.

Eliott chucks the invitation as soon as Daphne’s rounded the corner.

-

Later that night at his house, Arthur asks him, "So are we going as yin and yang or ketchup and mustard?" 

Eliott’s never felt more trapped in his own bedroom. "What are you going on about," he mumbles.

"Daphne’s party."

"Who's Daphne?"

A pillow hits his face. 

"You can't throw my own things in my own room," Eliott says crossly, sitting up from where he had been lying down on his bed with his feet propped up on the headboard, crossing his legs.

"I just did," Arthur shoots back. He continues playing with the slime Eliott’s cousin had made for him for his birthday that year, which had been admittedly sitting in a container on his desk untouched far too long for his guilty conscience to handle any longer. Bless Arthur and his constant need to always be touching something.

"What if it was your room and I threw one of your things?"

"It was a pillow, Eliott."

"Okay," Eliott replies. He hopes the conversation about Daphne’s party has been dropped.

It has not. "So, I think yin and yang. We can save the primary colors for another time. I call yang. Brings out the hazel of my eyes quite nicely." 

Eliott frowns. "I... don't even know which one is yang." 

"The white. It's just a white t-shirt. You wear a black one. And I know you’ll probably wear your stupid brown jacket that you always wear with it. I know that's all the effort you're willing to put in, so since I'm the bestest friend in the entire universe, I'll gladly go along with your minimalistic practices and comforts."

Eliott rolls over so he's on his stomach, facing Arthur. Arthur gives him a look that says, 'I dare you to contradict any statements I've just made.'

"Listen," Eliott starts. 

"I don't care that you're worried you're gonna see a bunch of tits in a pool or that the entire neighborhood will end up in flames because the hosts stole a garden gnome. I'll pick you up Friday at nine. I have homework. See you later." 

Arthur throws the slime at the wall, where it sticks and stays. They both stare at the purple blob in silence for a beat or two. Then Arthur picks up his backpack from off the floor, slings it over his shoulder, and walks out the door. "Arrivaderci," he calls. 

Eliott stares at the purple blob for at least two more hours before going to bed.

-

When Friday rolls around, Eliott kisses his mother goodnight at 8 and heads off to his room. He tries to spend 30 minutes tackling his calculus homework (and ends up staring at the purple blob still on the wall for a majority of that time), then changes into his black skinnies and black t-shirt. He puts on the brown jacket after sending a silent, mental “Fuck you” to Arthur. He slips on his not-so-white-anymore chunky Fila’s. Then he sits on his bed and stares at his phone. 

When he's read 'Friday, October 29' for the five hundredth time and watched the time change from 9:03 to 9:04, he gets the text from Arthur. 

After he's successfully shimmied out of the window, hopped off the roof, and is safely buckled in the passenger seat of Arthur’s white Prius, he says, "I'm scared shitless."

"Are you wearing a diaper?" 

"Since I'm scared shitless, that means I don't have any shit in me, Arthur. Why would I need a diaper?" 

"For when you piss yourself."

Eliott squints. "I'm also scared pissless." 

Arthur hums. "Cool."

They pull up to the averagely sized two-story house at 9:28. The party looks well under way, with a couple teenagers standing or lounging around on the front porch as well as the front yard, some with elaborately thought out costumes of bright colors, others wearing simple t-shirts like Eliott and Arthur. Somebody's TP’ed one of the front yard trees. There's music playing that seems to shake the entire house, the neighboring houses, and the stars in the night sky above. There's also a lot of yelling. And singing. He wonders if the neighbors had started complaining. He wonders if the police will make an appearance any time soon. 

"I'm ready to go home," Eliott announces, but Arthur grabs his arm and pulls him to the door.

Just the entrance is already a flurry of movements and sounds, and it's everything Eliott had imagined a highschool party to be. He's a senior and it's his first ever high school party. It's not sad because he's very focused on his academics and is hopelessly dedicated to his pre-destined vocation as a veterinarian. It's how he's justified the notion every night for the past three years. 

Arthur pulls him into the kitchen area, where at least 3 couples are making out, a couple of people are mixing drinks, and at least two people seem to be ransacking the pantry. Arthur squeezes in between "Josh!" and "Andrew!" and pours a can of beer out into two red solo cups.

Arthur hands him one and stares him dead in the eyes. 

"Your eyes are red," Eliott tries. "Maybe all this second hand smoke is getting to you."

"Drink the fucking beer, mate," Arthur answers menacingly.

Eliott does, because he's a people pleaser and hates disappointing his one friend. 

"Cool," Arthur says, and then Eliott blinks and he’s gone. 

Instead of panicking, he downs the rest of the beer. And then he gets another. And another. And then he spins in circles in the kitchen for a little while. 

After a while, Josh (or is it Andrew? They look painstakingly alike. He thinks they're dressed as cheerleaders) gives him a worried look. "Bro," he says. "If you're gonna throw up, go out and do it in the back." He points in the general direction of what Eliott assumes to be the back. 

Eliott smiles to himself as he shuffles towards the back. His mind feels a little wonky, and he wonders if it’s normal. Bro. Hell yeah, he's a bro. He's the bro-iest bro that's ever bro'd before. He can do parties. As soon as he gets to the back for whatever reason he's going to the back that he's forgotten, he's gonna get back in there and party it the fuck up. Then he's gonna make out with a hot girl, or hot guy, and then he's gonna get a hickey, and then his mom's gonna question where he got said hickey, and then he'll tell her-

"Mate, you gotta throw the fuck up and leave." 

Eliott blinks, and realizes he's on the back porch now. It's wooden. Daphne’s backyard opens up into the woods. There's a bonfire going on a little while's away, and a couple of teenagers are scattered throughout the grassy patches before the woods. There's a chair swing that looks like it should only hold four people, but he quickly counts seven people piled onto it. They all look happy drunk, and they're all laughing at something someone else said. The grass looks wet, the breeze is making the gargantuan pine trees sway to the tune of the music, and Eliott needs to turn around and politely address the stranger that's said something to him. 

He turns around. He whines in the back of his throat and wishes he did wear a diaper. 

Eliott stares at the stranger's brown mess of a hairstyle that sits atop his head in silky strands, jutting around in different directions, the perfect balance between artfully tousled and put-together. Eliott would die to run his hands through it. He takes in the bomber jacket, the gray hoodie, the black jeans, the platform Nikes. He takes in the golden tan skin, illuminated by the crappy lightbulb in the ceiling's corner. He takes in the chiseled jawline, the two dainty fingers that entrap a joint between them, smoke trailing out of its end. He stares at the curve of his nose, the pursed, plump pink lips, the raised, perfectly angled eyebrows. He settles on the eyes of blue, blue, blue, blue, bluer than any ocean Eliott had ever encountered in his seventeen years of living, in his seventeen years of emptiness, of despair, of never knowing what true beauty was until now, when he is seventeen years, eight months and 28 days old and experiencing such beauty for the first time ever. 

"Mate," the stranger's voice comes again, and Eliott blinks himself out of his lustful gaze. "Stop... staring. If you want a hit, just join me." 

He's sitting alone on the green sofa, slouching so his head is settled on the back pillows behind him. His legs are wide open, he's manspreading. Eliott thinks there's a perfect amount of room right there for him to kneel down between his muscular thighs and blow him. He's about to ask if he's allowed to when the stranger speaks again. 

"Dude," he says. "Sit the fuck down, Jesus." 

Eliott does, right next to him. The other boy holds the joint out to him expectedly. 

"I don't smoke," Eliott slurs. 

The stranger blinks. Eliott misses the blue of his eyes even when it's just gone for a second. "Then why the fuck did you sit- whatever. Whatever." 

Eliott stares as the other boy brings the joint to his lips and takes a long inhale, his cheeks hollowing and chest rising. Eliott holds his breath with him, then breathes out quietly as the other exhales the smoke. Eliott thinks that might just have been the hottest thing he'd ever seen in his life. He wishes he were better at waxing poetry within the depths of his mind so he could write a sonnet about the way this boy makes smoking weed seem so sexy, but he is a high school boy and the only thing on his mind is sex. Not words. He doesn't like succumbing to that stereotype, but this boy is really fit.

"What's your name?" Eliott asks as he slowly sinks down to match the position of the other boy. 

"I'm Lucas," he answers carefully, turning his head to look uninterestingly at him. He unabashedly checks him out, dragging his eyes from his dirty converse to his five second hair, then back down to his eyes. Eliott tries to ignore the goosebumps that erupt upon his skin when cerulean eyes meet his once more. He thinks the name Lucas is utterly beautiful and unique and magnificent, never mind the fact that he’s known like seven Lucases in his life. "Yours?"

"Eliott. DeMaury. I go to Winters, I'm a senior. I take pictures for the school newspaper sometimes. Where do you go? I think I definitely would’ve noticed you by now if you'd attended there." 

Lucas takes another long drag of his spliff. "Thanks for the Tinder bio," he says, and doesn't answer the question. 

Eliott furtively angles his body to the right so he can fully face Lucas and stare at him a little bit more. He rests his head back on the back cushions and stares as Lucas takes another drag. 

"You're staring at me," Lucas says.

"Why are you out here all alone?" Eliott asks.

"Because all my acquaintances in that house are football players on the honor roll, and if they get caught anywhere near anything even remotely smelling like weed, it's military camp and college rejection letters for the rest of their life."

Eliott continues to stare. "And you?" 

Lucas takes another drag. "Hm. Me. Suppose I've not got a single fuck to give." 

“How do you know Daphne?”

“Those football players I know. Daphne’s basically my sister, I’ve known her since we were kids. Came for the drinks.” 

After a couple beats of staring, Lucas turns his head to face him. They're merely an inch apart, and Eliott wants to kiss him so badly his bones ache and his ears start to ring. He almost misses the question Lucas asks him.

"You wanna try?" 

Eliott blinks. "I've got really bad asthma," he answers. 

Lucas rolls his eyes and faces the woods once more. "Pussy."

Eliott shoots up. "Actually, you shouldn't use that word as an insult because it's misogynistic and further propels the correlation of a woman's very important and strong body part to a weak, frail, and most of all unwilling object, therefore further supporting rape culture and the notion that women can not be strong or powerful due to the simple association between a body part she can’t control and and what defines her. Power to the pussy, and all that." 

A beat passes. Lucas' head rolls back to face him. "You fucking nerd."

Eliott takes a breath.

He then thinks that Lucas' hair looks so soft, several tiny mice could make their home upon his head. His breath smells so, so strongly of weed, and it does nothing but stir up arousal deep in the pits of his stomach. "'M'not. I'm just on honor roll too."

Lucas scoffs. "Of course you are. Let's shotgun. You've been staring at my lips for the past five minutes." 

Eliott says, "Actually, I’m more of an eyes guy, and yours are absolutely killing it,” then stops. "Shotgun? We're driving somewhere?" 

"God, just shut up. I'll show you," Lucas says, then without any preamble whatsoever, sits up and flips a leg over Eliott’s own legs to straddle him.

Eliott almost moans when he feels Lucas' muscular jean-clad thighs over his own, then decides he'd rather be six feet under then let this beautiful boy know he's so easy for him already that he'd come apart just by some simple straddling. He instead chooses to focus on the fact that they're kind of twinning with their black skinnies. He finds immense joy in that fact. Maybe they're soulmates.

"Keep your mouth kind of open. No, not that wide, stupid. There. Don't move."

Eliott watches Lucas in front of him with his mouth slightly open, illuminated in moonlight, as Lucas takes a long hit of his blunt. Then, instead of exhaling the smoke out into the night air right away, Lucas fits his mouth right over Eliott’s and blows into his mouth. 

Eliott feels the effects of the marijuana immediately, dizzying his senses and his lungs are dying to cough, but somehow his brain instead chooses to focus on the fact that Lucas' lips are right over his and that he should be doing something about it right now. His hands come up to grasp Lucas' waist under his bomber jacket, pulling him impossibly closer, and his tongue slips into Lucas' mouth. Lucas reacts immediately, his free hand coming to grasp the back of Eliott’s neck, accepting the challenge and kissing him back just as hard. As Eliott tastes Lucas for the first time, he feels himself spiraling down a black, black hole of comfort, serenity, and pure bliss, and startlingly realizes that he could spend an entire lifetime kissing Louis. Their lips continue to move together, Eliott reveling in the unfamiliar taste of smoke and smell of cologne. As their tongues get to know each other and breaths out of their noses gets shorter, Lucas begins to grind down on Eliott. Eliott then, unashamedly unable to keep it in, does let out a moan.

The porch door bangs open and Eliott hears a very familiar voice say, "What the fuck." 

Lucas immediately retracts from Eliott, stumbling as he struggles to stand up and facing the door. Eliott takes in his slightly mussed hair, the askew orientation of his bomber jacket and his crinkled gray hoodie, the redness of his swollen lips and in awe thinks, ‘Wow, I did that.’

"Dude." 

Eliott’s gaze shifts to behind Lucas and a little to the left, where two girls who seem to have appeared out of nowhere, clad in tiny tank tops, are staring at them, red solo cups in hand and scrunchies on their wrist, sitting on the porch fence. "Not fair. We were watching that."

He turns to the door to see Arthur’s wide eyes, rapidly switching from between Eliott and Lucas and to the girls. He'll admit the girls are very pretty. Not his type, though, which has been blue eyes, brown hair, and strong thighs since approximately 32 minutes ago. 

"My brother... texted and said my mom's on her way home, so... I kind of need to be there. And I'm kind of your ride home." Arthur glances at Lucas. "I mean, unless you've got... other arrangements."

"No," Lucas says. Eliott gives him a very, very sad look. Lucas rolls his eyes. "I'm not gonna corrupt you anymore. I don't want you stumbling into your bedroom at half past four in the morning with red eyes and alcohol on your breath only to find your mother crying on your bed. You don't seem like that kind of person."

"He's not," Arthur tells him, a little bit defensively. "He seems like the type of person to cry harder than his mother if he ever saw his mother cry," one of the scrunchie-girls says, to which the other scrunchie-girl giggles. She's got blonde hair, Eliott notes, instead of choosing to answer. 

Eliott stands, and is pleased to see that, holy fuck, he's got a shit ton of inches on Lucas. Lucas is small, and Eliott is more attracted to him because of their height difference than he thought was possible. It makes him feel powerful. Power to his pussy. Then he's quickly sobered up by the realization that he really doesn't know anything at all about this beautiful boy in front of him, and he'd probably fall into a very depressed state if he were to never see him again.

"When can I see you again?" He asks him, painfully aware of the desperation that laces his tone.

Lucas shrugs. "Dunno. Follow me on Instagram. Luc-all-ament. See you around." He then makes a very dramatic exit back into the house, the porch screen door slamming behind him. Eliott nearly cries at the immediate loss of his energy and radiant aura. The porch light seems to dim like it senses that Lucas is gone.

"He goes to Penn's," Scrunchie girl number 2 says. This one's got her red hair tied in another scrunchie. Eliott’s confused as to why she's got two, but decides it'd be better not to question that and instead question the more important matter.

"Penn's?" He inquires.

"Penn's school, but the one for boys. It's up near the Ivy," the first scrunchie girl answers.

Eliott’s about to ask more about his new-found obsession when he hears Arthur clear his throat. 

"Oh shit," Eliott says. "Sorry. Let's go."

He says bye to the scrunchie girls, bye to the woods, and bye to the house before finding himself safely strapped into Arthur’s Prius once more.

"So," Arthur begins awkwardly as they start to drive. "You're gay?" 

Eliott blinks. That was definitely not the question he'd been expecting.

"I don't... think I really think about gender. If I like them, I like them." 

Arthur nods. "Cool."

"Cool," Eliott echoes.

Silence. Then Arthur says, "So, you saw no tits in a pool."

"Not a single one. To be fair, there was no pool."

"The neighborhood wasn't on fire."

"To be fair, we left really early."

Arthur considers. "The neighborhood wasn't on fire yet," to which Eliott hesitatingly decides to nod. Arthur smiles smugly. "However, you found a hot guy and made out with him." 

Eliott smiles. "Yeah, I did."

When they reach Eliott’s neighborhood and Arthur’s stopped three houses down, Arthur says hopefully, "So I'm guessing more parties in the future."

Eliott considers. "I think... I'm satisfied with who I've found with this one," then softly closes the door and jogs toward his house. 

-

At midnight, when he's finally finished his homework and is laying down in his bed with nothing but his boxers on, he opens up Instagram and searches up Lucas' username. 

He's on private, but his profile picture is a baby picture. His bio says nothing but his name.

Eliott doesn't sleep for about another two hours after requesting him, but when he does, he dreams of deep blue eyes and soft pink lips. 

-

Lucas accepts his follow request the Monday after that weekend after school, requesting Eliott back. Eliott decides against liking all 74 of his posts and instead decides to just like his three most recent, which include a meme, a picture of food, and a picture of him with a girl. The girl is pretty and Eliott assumes that she’s just a friend and because he’s nothing short of optimistic and also because the caption quite plainly states, ‘Blessed that Emma left her boyfriend for two seconds to take a picture with me.’

The girl is beautiful but Eliott can't take his eyes off Lucas next to her, even when he's wearing nothing but a hoodie and jeans. 

Eliott DM's him right away. 

_hey, it's eliott from the party :)_

He doesn't get a reply. 

  
  


-

The next time Eliott sees Lucas, it's the next weekend and he's at the arcade with Arthur. Arthur’s bent down to put coins into the claw machine, and out of the corner of his eye, he sees Lucas playing air hockey with a young girl that resembles Lucas uncannily.

He tries to not immediately freak out, but it's hard not to when Lucas' has been all he’s been thinking about this week. He couldn't study for his statistics test and barely passed it by strategic guessing.

"Arthur," he hisses. "Don't turn around, but my beautiful boy from the party is literally right behind us." 

Arthur whips around. 

Eliott follows his line of gaze and meets the eyes of Lucas. He smiles and Lucas raises his eyebrows back at him. His sister hits the puck right into his goal.

As Lucas' sister is doing some kind of victory dance that involves a lot of flinging arms and kicking legs, Eliott decides to summon any ounce of confidence scattered throughout his wiry body and make his way towards Lucas. He leaves Arthur to his own devices, hopefully to win an oversized teddy bear for Eliott. 

"Hey Lucas," he says, aiming for cool but actually sounding sort of relieved, for he's literally ecstatic that the party hadn't ended up being the last time he'd been graced with Lucas' presence. He grips the side of the air hockey table and leans on his hands, facing Lucas completely with a small smile on his lips.

"Eliott," Lucas greets him cooly, and Eliott’s about to ask why his DM had been left unanswered when there's suddenly a hand slapping at his left forearm, and he's forced to turn his head around to the little girl, the source of the abuse. 

"Mister," she's saying, "we're in the middle of a game, and you can't distract my brother like that." 

"I... just said hi," he answers nervously, because even if this girl looks to be about 10, her eyes are even icier than her brother's and she's got quite the death stare trained on Eliott. 

"I didn't ask though," the girl replies, and Lucas scoffs. 

"Go play one of the gun games, I'll be there in a second," he tells her, and the little girl rolls her eyes and stalks off. 

"What's up? Sober now?" Lucas addresses him, coming over to face Eliott, his hands in the pocket of his red hoodie. His hair looks soft and he looks so well rested, it hurts Eliott’s heart. 

"You... never responded to my DM," Eliott says slowly. 

Lucas blinks. "I didn't know you DM'ed me. I kind of rarely get to go on my phone."

"How come?"

Lucas' eyes flick away, to the lit up air hockey game floor beside them before back to meeting Eliott eyes. "Strict parents and all that, you know how it is." 

"Yeah," Eliott breathes out, and he can't help but smile stupidly because Lucas is here finally, and he's given a reason to why he hadn't DM'ed him back and it seems reasonable, and he's just so, so unbelievably pretty. 

"You wanna go get pancakes?" He blurts out. 

Lucas crinkles his nose. "Can't. This is the only- I mean, I've gotta be watching my sister right now. Sorry."

Eliott bites his lip and tries not to look as disappointed as he feels. "Okay. Cool."

Lucas then says, "But like, I go to Penn's. And I think you told me that you go to Winters. So if there's any upcoming sports games or anything, I'll probably see you then." 

Eliott tells himself to check the game schedule the second Lucas is out of sight. "You can just DM me about when the next one is." 

Lucas winces. "I've got like, really limited phone usage." 

"Oh. Okay." 

“Really limited.”

“...Okay.”

Lucas ' sister comes back and pulls on his sleeve. "We're out of coins and I wanna go watch the movie now."

"'Kay," he tells her, then turns back to Eliott. "I'll see you around, then?"

Eliott nods too close to the brink of too over excited. Lucas is about to turn around, but Eliott stops him with, "Yeah. Um, you look really good. Today. And all days. Even at the party, you. You took my breath away." 

Eliott feels immense satisfaction in the color he sees rising up Lucas' neck, but his sister gives him a really grossed out look that kind of puts a damper on his feelings. Lucas only has time to mumble out a small thanks before his sister is pulling him away for good. 

Arthur comes stumbling up to him, hugging a very large purple teddy bear to the front of his body. "Cute boy from the party?" He asks. "He get any cuter to you?"

Eliott answers, "Yeah," when the poetry he wants to wax about Lucas' eyelashes get lost in his throat. "When's the next footie game between Penn and Winters?" Arthur’s kind of obsessed with the school’s sports schedule.

"This upcoming Friday. It's the next one. Why?" Arthur’s very obsessed with the school’s sports schedule.

Eliott doesn't question Arthur’s oddness. He also doesn’t question the fact that they literally are soulmates, that fate wants them together so bad. He instead says, "No reason. Thanks for the bear."

Arthur goes, "It's not yours. You left me. Fucking asshole."

Eliott guesses he deserved that, a little. 

-

On Friday after a very lackluster week (his only friend is Arthur and he spends most of his lunches in the library doing homework so he can just go home and watch Netflix and not hang out with anyone) Eliott wears the only Winters spirit wear he has (a navy blue t-shirt with the school's logo on it) and shows up with Arthur to the stadium 20 minutes early. 

"You better go home with him and fuck until sunrise, or I swear to God this shit's for nothing," Arthur grumbles, his hands shoved deep into the pockets of his jeans. 

"Every action counts for something," Eliott replies nonchalantly, his heart thumping in excitement over the chance of actually getting to see Lucas again. 

"Fuck off," Arthur answers.

"If it's meant to be, it'll be," he counters. He's already hopelessly falling head over heels for a boy he's seen a total of two times in his life. 

When they get into the stadium, Eliott immediately starts to walk over to their opponent's side, and Arthur nearly has a heart attack when he does, disbelief visibly gracing his features. "Bro, what the hell are you doing?"

Eliott gives him a confused look. "I want to find Lucas."

Arthur gives him an exasperated look right back. "Dude, we're gonna get crushed over here." 

Eliott shrugs. "Love is love and also, love conquers all. You can head back if you'd like."

He pretends to not hear Arthur cursing up a storm behind him, and instead continues to trek forward up the hill into the bleachers. There's a boy sitting in the back, where they are at the top, wearing a yellow Penn's shirt. He turns to give him a look right away, so Eliott chooses to smile at him. Kill them with kindness, and all that. "Hey, do you happen to know a Lucas Lallament?" 

The boy looks at both Arthur and Eliott warily, taking in their blue clothes and smiling faces. "I don't know, why? If you're going to harass him, I can call security on you guys right now."

Eliott’s eyes widen. "No, why in the world would we do anything like that? He's my friend. Kind of? No, definitely, we're friends."

The boy still continues to look worried (or maybe that's his natural face; he’s really attractive, but he sort of resembles a stressed out Basset Hound) but decides to give them a chance. "Okay. He's one of my close friends, so you better not be pulling my leg or anything. I can literally call security on you guys if I think anything's going wrong. He's, um. The coach's assistant. So he's probably down there on the field. I don't think you'll be able to talk to him until after the game." 

Eliott says, "Drat."

The boy looks at him for a little while longer. "How do you guys know Lucas?"

"Met him at a party," Eliott answers at the same time Arthur says, "Eliott’s pregnant with his first child." 

Eliott’s eyes widen and stay on the Penn boy’s eyes that seem to widen just as much as his, if not more.

Arthur awkwardly coughs. "That was a poorly timed joke. Sorry. It's not true." 

The boy continues to stare at him. How does such a distressed face manage to look even more distressed? 

An announcer says, "And now, please rise for the national anthem and remain standing for the pledge of allegiance, performed by our very own Winters marching band."

Arthur and Eliott awkwardly remain where they are behind yellow jersey boy throughout the whole thing.

Right after, Eliott sits down next to him. Both Arthur and the boy make similar sounds of distress and disbelief. Eliott’s decided to not let this boy out of his sight, because he's going to lead them straight to Lucas right after this stupid football game. "What's your name?" If this is a friend of Lucas, it's his friend too. 

"Sofiane," he says hesitantly. 

"Cool. I'm Eliott, this is my best friend Arthur. He's not a natural blonde." 

"At least I'm naturally fucking sexy."

"That didn't even make any sense or correlate to anything about this conversation."

"You brought up my hair! That was so unnecessary!"

"Your mom giving birth to you was unnecessary." 

"You would die without me, you asshole!" 

"How do you know Lucas?" Eliott’s attention is back on Sofiane now.

Sofiane had turned his attention towards the game during their bickering, which, he actually seems interested in. Go figure. He can't relate. At Eliott’s question he gives him a brief side eye. "He's, um... he was my foster brother for a while," he mumbles. 

Eliott blinks. Arthur probably blinks. (He can't tell because he's between them and all his focus is on Sofiane.)

"Lucas is a foster kid?" He asks.

There's cheerleaders in purple and silver uniforms below them on the track, stunting and yelling out aggressive cheers. Eliott chooses to focus on his confusion around how Penn manages to have cheerleaders when they're an all boy's school instead of trying to imagine a lifetime of Lucas in foster care. He tries to focus on the announcer yelling "Touchdown!" for whatever team, he's unsure, instead of imagining the beautiful boy in unbeautiful conditions, being torn and transferred from house to house, constantly on the move, never having a set place to call home.

Sofiane looks panic stricken. "Wait, maybe I wasn't supposed to tell you that. It's not something to be embarrassed about at all, in fact it's not even embarrassing- he- I hate spreading things, I don't know if he wanted that out to strangers- he keeps to himself mostly, I don't know-" 

"They're not strangers, they kissed," Arthur unhelpfully chimes in. 

Sofiane looks ready to faint. "You couldn't have. He doesn’t go out that much." 

"I... just said they did."

"Arthur!" Eliott scolds. "I'm sorry about him."

"Is that why you're here? Are you his boyfriend?" Sofiane questions.

Arthur responds, "He wants to be," at the same time Eliott says no. 

Sofiane looks like he has no idea how to deal with either of them. "...Okay. Don't bother me till the end of the game."

-

Sofiane surprisingly watches the entire game with a stoic, seemingly interested face while Arthur and Eliott make fun of the players and marvel at how strong the cheerleaders are. Once the game ends (Penn wins, 58-4; they just lost their best quarterback last year, so that kind of blows) Sofiane stands and stretches his arms above his head. Eliott immediately follows suit. Minus the stretch.

"Okay," Sofiane says. "I guess we can head down there and say hi to Lucas." 

They make their way down to the field, where the football boys are celebrating with the cheerleaders, laughing and screaming. Sofiane spots Lucas with the coach right away (the coach is at least 6'2, an obnoxiously bright yellow cap upon his head and a headset he's still screaming into). 

"Lulu," Sofiane calls, and Lucas' head whips around to see him. His smile widens and Sofiane runs to give him a huge hug. Eliott and Arthur awkwardly trail behind. 

When the embrace ends, Lucas' eyes rest on Eliott and Arthur, and his smile falters a bit as he tilts his head in confusion. "Oh. Hey." 

Lucas is wearing black skinnies (again) and a yellow windbreaker that looks like his school's merch. He looks 100% adorable. Eliott’s not surprised. Eliott wants to hug him too, but he barely manages to refrain. 

"Hey, Lucas. It's really nice seeing you again."

Arthur clears his throat behind him. 

"This is Arthur. He was at the party with me, I don't think I formally introduced you guys."

Lucas gives Arthur a tight smile. "Nice to meet you," he says awkwardly. 

Sofiane watches Eliott watch Lucas as they stand in their little circle. Out of the corner of his eye, he watches Arthur exasperatedly look up to the stars in the night sky above them. 

"Are you good to go, Lu?" Sofiane finally asks, and Lucas nods. 

"I just checked out with the coach," he answers.

"Cool. Arthur and Eliott, um. We're gonna hit up Denny's. It's like a post-game ritual Lucas and I adopted. Are you down for coming with?" 

Lucas’ panic-stricken eyes whip to Sofiane.

“Yes!” Eliott says. Arthur makes a distressed noise. Eliott frowns at him and leans down to whisper, “Your mom will be okay with you missing curfew by a little bit. Chill out.” 

-

  
  


Arthur’s Prius follows Sofiane’s white Jeep. The Denny’s parking lot is full, and there’s teenagers in football jerseys or spirit wear everywhere they look. 

They manage to get a booth after a couple minutes of awkward silence spent waiting to be seated. Lucas and Eliott are across from each other on the inside and Eliott can’t wait to play footsies with him. Lucas is avoiding his gaze. 

“How do you guys know each other?” Arthur awkwardly asks from his position next to Eliott. 

Sofiane’s about to say something but Lucas cuts in. “School.”

And even if Sofiane hadn’t said anything about their position prior to now, Eliott would have been able to sense the lie from a mile away.

They eat their pancakes and make awkward small talk about their respective schools and traditions. Apparently it’s annoying to go to an all boy’s school, but it helps keep them focused on academics, and the all girl’s Penn school is only like a ten minute walk away, so some students sneak off to see their girlfriends during lunch anyways. Eliott absolutely can not keep his eyes off of Lucas no matter how hard he tries, and he should feel guilty about how much Lucas squirms under his gaze, but he also just can’t bring himself to care. Eliott’s foot slides against his shin and Lucas jolts like he’s been electrocuted, banging the table’s underside with his knee. Sofiane and Arthur turn to him with wide eyes. Lucas gives him an exasperated look. 

“Sorry.”

Soon, they’re making fun of the Penn football coach and Arthur’s doing a really good impersonation of his enraged calls and pep talks. They’re all laughing at Arthur’s goofiness, and Eliott still keeps stealing glances at Lucas. Happy looks good on him. 

When they’re finishing up, Sofiane’s phone buzzes on the table. He reads the text then winces. “Hey, Lucas... I don’t think you can stay over tonight.”

Lucas’s head whips up. “What? Why not?”

“Grandma’s at the hospital again. Nothing bad though, don’t worry. I, um...” He reads his text again. “Shoot, I actually should go now.” Sofiane stands up and throws some bills onto the counter. “I could call Andy for you,” he says to Lucas, to which Lucas vigorously shakes his head.

“No, no, I’ll be okay.”

“Are you sure?” Sofiane asks.

“Positive.”

Sofiane looks to Arthur and Eliott. He leans in and threatens, “If you don’t see that he’s safe with a place to stay tonight I’ll end the both of you.” He straightens up and then smiles. “Keep the change. It was nice meeting you guys, no matter how weird you were in the beginning.” He gives them a two finger salute and then exits.

Lucas watches him leave with wide eyes then slowly turns back around to face both of them.

Eliott jumps in, “You can stay over at my place. If you need to.” Arthur pinches him under the table and gives him an incredulous look. 

Lucas replies awkwardly, “I barely know you. I couldn’t make you do that.”

“No, but. My mom takes in homeless kids all the time, we have a room set up for kids who don’t have a safe place to stay during the night.”

Lucas wrinkles his nose. “I’m not homeless.”

Eliott says, “No, I wasn’t implying that you were. Just know that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with it. We all go through rough patches in our life.”

Lucas shifts in his seat. “I don’t know...”

Arthur says, “Do you have any other options?”

  
  


-

Arthur drives them to Eliott’s house with Lucas in the backseat, and the car’s only filled with Frank Sinatra’s silky tones. They reach his house and exchange goodbye’s, and then they’re in the driveway with Lucas staring up at the monstrosity of the house and Eliott staring at Lucas staring at his house. 

“Your house is huge.” Lucas states.

“I like to think of it as practically proportioned,” Eliott answers as they make their way to the front door. He unlocks it, and steps aside for Lucas to answer. 

“My parents are both at work, so. I’ll show you your room.”

Lucas’ wide eyes are taking in the interior of the house in awe, and his jaw has dropped ever so slightly. Eliott wants to kiss that look right off of his stupid face. “You live here?” Lucas whispers and Eliott nods. 

“It’s right up here.” He leads Lucas up one of the marble staircases, Lucas still taking in the house in a completely dumbfounded state, and down one of the many hallways. 

“What do your parents do?” Lucas asks as he stops to stare at one of their marble chandeliers.

“They’re in the mafia,” Eliott answers, to which Lucas stops marveling at his house to give him an incredulous look. They turn down the hallway to his room. He opens the door and steps into the room.

“That door’s the bathroom. There’s towels under the sink. Um, that entire dresser is just new pajamas and never used underwear, so. If you want to shower, you can shower.”

Lucas' eyes turn to his. He looks completely lost in the grandness of this guest bedroom, his feet practically sinking in the faux fur rug. “How...” he trails off.

“My great-great something grandfather invented something. The toaster or some other important kitchen thing. And then my dad’s a lawyer, and my mom owns a business. It goes.” 

He shows Lucas where his room is (“I’m right down the hall, the only door with the stupid whiteboard on it because I forget things really easily”) and then shuts the door behind him. Eliott’s hesitant to leave Lucas alone in there because he just looks so lost, but he knows that staying in the room with him would just be too damn weird and overstep way too many boundaries. He’s still curious as to why Lucas needs a place to stay, but, again. The boundaries.

-

Eliott’s a light sleeper, so he hears it when the door creaks open and shuts. He opens one eye and sees that it’s one in the morning.

“Are you here to kill me?” He croaks out.

A soft shuffle of feet. A whisper. “It’s a really big room, and I’m not used to being in a room that big alone.” 

Eliott scoots over to the bed’s left side. “Come here then,” he calls softly.

He feels the dip of the bed behind him, the rubbing together of sheets as Lucas struggles to get under the blankets. And then, to his utmost surprise, Lucas is snuggling up right behind him, scooting up on the bed to put his head right behind Eliott’s on the pillow, his breath hitting the back of his neck. Eliott can feel his entire front against his back, and it takes everything in him to not whip around, pin this boy down, and kiss him senseless.

“I couldn’t go home because... my mom’s always caught up in some stuff,” Lucas whispers into his neck softly. Eliott nods into his pillow slowly.

“You’re safe here,” he whispers back. 

So they fall asleep like that. 

-

He wakes up first, and some time in the night he’s turned around to face Lucas. Lucas, who looks like an absolute angel lying in his bed. The sunlight from the open windows are hitting him just right, emitting a golden glow from his skin. He watches him sleep. He watches the flutter of Lucas’ endless eyelashes, the parted lips as soft breaths escape from them. He realizes with a start that Lucas is still wearing his clothes from last night, and the fact saddens him to no end. He didn’t take Eliott’s pajamas. He wants to reach out and touch, wants to trail his fingers down his cheek and into his mouth, wants to wake Lucas up with a pepper of kisses. He refrains. 

Eliott slaps a post-it note that says, “Come have breakfast! (:” onto his pillow, then makes his way downstairs.

Isabella is a beautiful woman and she holds Eliott more accountable to anything he ever does more than anyone else in his life. Well, more than the like, four other people in his life. She’s technically their housekeeper, but Eliott hates calling her that. She’s just family to him.

She’s cooking the classic eggs and bacon, and there’s already bowls of fruit on the large kitchen island. “How are you, Bonita?” Eliott calls as he takes a seat and pops a grape into his mouth.

“Alive,” she says back and gives Eliott a sweet smile. They talk about her kids for a bit, and Eliott’s telling her a story about how Chris, her eldest son, had found turtles in their backyard the last time they had come over, when a soft patter of feet sound behind him. 

Lucas is in the doorway looking absolutely lost. The sleeves of his windbreaker are covering his hands and his hair’s an absolute mess. Eliott rests his chin on his hand and smiles at him sweetly. “Hey, Lucas,” he greets him softly. “Good morning.” 

Lucas stares. “I should go home.”

Eliott looks at Isabella and raises his eyebrows. They’ve been through this procedure way too many times before.

“Absolute nonsense!” Isabella exclaims, wiping her hands off on her apron and leading Lucas into the chair next to Eliott. “I’m cooking this grand meal for you, mi hijo. I can see your mouth watering from a mile away, eat, eat, you are much, much too skinny.” 

They share their meal in silence, but it’s not weighty and it’s not uncomfortable. Eliott enjoys the company of the boy next to him a little too much too soon, and he’d sit in silence with him forever if it meant he got to admire his looks as much as he wanted to.

His mom bustles into the kitchen in her suit, singing, “Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound!” She gives Isabella a kiss on the cheek, then gives one to Eliott, and then one to Lucas. Lucas jolts back in surprise, and Eliott’s mom laughs. 

“Another straggler, Eliott?” She asks as she loads up the Keurig. “Or is this finally the boyfriend we’ve been waiting for? Oh, he’s adorable, Eliott, please make it the latter or I’ll be very upset.”

Eliott rolls his eyes. “Lucas just needed a place to stay last night, mom.” 

His mom sighs, then gives Lucas a wink. “Another time, then. You’re welcome here whenever you want, honey.” She smiles at all of them as she grabs her thermos and her packed lunch from Isabella. “I love you all, and I’ll see you tonight!” 

She bustles out and Eliott continues to eat. But Lucas isn’t touching his food anymore.

Eliott looks at him still looking after the way his mom exited. “You okay?” He questions.

“Your mom’s so...” Lucas trails off. But Eliott can see it in his eyes. They speak a thousand words that he just can’t formulate into coherent sentences, and Eliott knows. 

“Yeah, she‘s great,” he answers softly.

In his garage, Eliott unlocks the Tesla, then locks it again and waits patiently as Lucas, dumbfounded once more, walks from car to car, admiring every single one.

“I don’t get it,” he says. “You drive with Arthur when you have… all of these sports cars?”

Eliott responds, “Technically, only the Tesla’s mine. And I don’t like driving because one time, I drove our Ferrari off a bridge and into the lake.”

Lucas’ entire body freezes up at that. 

His head turns to Eliott in disbelief and it almost seems like he’s about to burst into tears.

“I was... kidding, it was a joke. Arthur doesn’t like driving alone, so I go with him most places.”

Lucas is still frozen and now his hands are shaking. Eliott stares at them from across the garage. “I’m sorry, that wasn’t a good joke. Let’s go?” He doesn’t push the matter anymore.

Lucas rubs a hand over his face and sighs. “Yeah,” he answers quietly, and then slides into the Tesla’s passenger seat. 

“You didn’t take the pajamas,” Eliott tells him as they exit the driveway. 

“They weren’t mine to take,” Lucas responds shortly. 

“I offered.” 

“Your mom knows you’re gay?” Lucas changes the subject.

“She knows gender is stupid and that I literally find absolutely anything attractive.” 

Lucas bites his lips and nods. After a while, he says, “No wonder your room looks like something straight off of a pre-teen girl’s Pinterest board.”

Eliott is taken aback by the playful jab but accepts it with ease. “That’s exactly where I drew the inspiration from.”

“Is it also where you got your inspiration for your hair?”

“Dude, don’t even start our hair’s like, basically the same.”

“No, mine’s better.”

Eliott scoffs. “Is not. I have natural highlights. Yours is just shitty brown.”

Lucas lets out a laugh. “Oh, shut up!”

“Fine, you win because you’re cute. And I like you.”

Lucas shuts up and sinks lower in his seat. 

He drops Lucas off at his school because he absolutely refuses to give him his address. “So you don’t stalk me,” he’d said, but Eliott knows the reason is greater because he stutters on the words and looks at anything but Eliott. 

He manages to force Lucas to write his number on his arm no matter how much Lucas insisted that he rarely got phone usage. “Call me if you ever need a place to stay.” And then because he’s a little shit, “That was fun. We can make it a regular thing, but next time, let’s do more than sleep.” 

Lucas scoffs. “In your dreams,” he says back as he slams the door and motions for Eliott to leave. Eliott sees him smiling as he pulls away.

Eliott goes back home and spends the rest of the day thinking of ocean eyes and messy bronze hair, pink lips and hedgehog features. 

-

It’s two days later and Eliott’s at the mall with Arthur, helping him shop for new clothes. 

“You can’t buy that, holy hell,” Eliott says as Arthur holds up, out of all things, an orange turtleneck. 

“Why not? It’s retro, that’s really in right now.”

“The football players would annihilate you in seconds.”

“Why should I care about what they think? What happened to not caring about other people’s opinions this year, Eliott? We’ve been working on this.”

“Good thing I don’t care about their opinion then, I care about you keeping both of your brain cells where they belong.”

His eyes drift and he has to do a double take when he recognizes Sofiane not even 30 feet away from them in the same store. Eliott makes his way to him briskly and takes no note of the noise of disbelief Arthur makes behind him.

“Hey. That jacket’s gonna go out of season in two weeks and by then it’ll be half off. Don’t get it now,” Eliott says.

Sofiane nearly jumps a mile into the air and his eyebrows raise impossibly high when he sees Eliott. “Oh, fuck. It’s you again.”

“Hi, it’s me again,” he affirms.

Arthur catches up and his eyes light up when he recognizes Sofiane. “Oh, hey. You.”

“Oh, hey, me,” Sofiane says back.

Then it’s basically an awkward three way standoff.

Sofiane exhales exasperatedly. “I guess this is fate, then.”

Eliott’s eyes whip up. “What is?” He asks excitedly.

“I should invite you guys because you’re not bad, and we don’t have any other friends. We’re going on a birthday camping trip this weekend, Lucas and I.”

“You’re willing to take strangers on your birthday trip?” Arthur asks.

Sofiane looks down. Then he looks up to the ceiling, almost as if he’s trying to plan a way to escape.

“Okay, I lied. It’s none of our birthdays.”

“So it’s just a trip for fun?”

“No, there’s a birthday. It’s my succulent. It’s her birthday this weekend.”

Arthur and Eliott blink.

“We... well, I, wanted her to celebrate where we first got her a year ago.”

Arthur and Eliott blink again.

“Uh, we’ll take my van... we really just want drivers to rotate. Lucas doesn’t drive and I get tired. We were gonna ask some of Lucas’ girlfriends to come with, but I think they’re busy.”

“We’re going on a camping trip to celebrate a plant’s birthday,” Arthur confirms in utter disbelief.

Sofiane winces. “It sounds stupid when you say it like that, but-“

“Oh, we’re so fucking in!” Eliott exclaims. “What’s your number, just text me the details and we’ll be ready.” 

When Sofiane’s given Eliott his number, leaving behind a very pleased Eliott and a worried Arthur, Arthur says, “Who trusts two random strangers that fast? To go on a whole ass camping trip? We could kill them.”

“Anyone who wants to wear an orange turtleneck isn’t capable of such extreme acts of violence.”

Arthur grumbles. “I don’t know... I always see murderers and thieves in turtlenecks...”

“Yeah, they’re never fucking orange, Arthur.”

“Your eye will be orange once I’m done beating you up.”

“Arthur, they’re black eyes because the eye gets black, you are literally so stupid-“ 

\- 

Friday is sleeping bags and chunky backpacks, thick coats and Timberland boots. 

Arthur and Eliott are waiting at their school on the pick up bench. Sofiane’s set to pick them up in... four minutes.

Arthur says, “You’re not gonna try to make a move on Lucas while we’re there, right?

Eliott squints at the sky. “The heart wants what it wants, brother.”

“My heart doesn’t wanna go on this trip,” Arthur grumbles. “I’m only doing it so you can get laid. And not get murdered.”

The van pulls up. It’s blue and full of character. Lucas gives them an awkward wave from the passenger seat. Eliott stands but doesn’t move for a couple beats, just stays there looking at Lucas with a stupid smile plastered on his face.

Sofiane comes out and helps them load their things into the trunk, and when they’re all settled, he turns around from the driver’s seat to look at both of them. “So, who wants the aux?” 

-

The camp ground Sofiane takes them to is cold and isolated with a bonfire in the middle and a picnic table and grill to the side. He says it’s private property owned by his dad.

Sofiane manages to set up the five man tent in what seems like three seconds, as Eliott, Lucas, and Arthur can only watch in awe. He sets up a single man tent and asks, “Rock, paper, scissors tournament for who gets this one?”

Arthur beats his rock with paper, and then Lucas beats Arthur’s scissors with a rock. Lucas shouts, “Yes!” and claps his hands as Sofiane shrugs and says, “It’s all yours.”

Eliott’s shoulders definitely don’t sag as they think about how he’s not going to be able to ‘coincidentally’ place his sleeping bag right next to Lucas’s in the five-man and then ‘accidentally’ cuddle him in their sleep. 

The afternoon’s spent with an exaggerated ceremony, including them decorating a bush with Dollar Store birthday party decorations for Sofiane’s succulent. He brings it out of his car with a flourish, holding it high above his head and presenting it to the other three. He says, “Voila!” and they respectfully sing happy birthday as Eliott and Arthur try their best to not look at each other in fear of bursting out into laughter. 

The evening’s spent with Sofiane grilling hot dogs and Arthur and Eliott playing a one-on-one soccer game with Lucas on the picnic table watching them. Eliott tries to show off as much as he possibly can, doing tricks with the ball and trying to keep it in the air for as long as he’s able to. He hears Lucas laugh more when he stumbles or misses a shot, though, so he considers it a win. 

They eat their hot dogs discussing superhero movie theories and Wes Anderson films. As night swallows the campgrounds, they light the fire with only a little struggle (Arthur was just throwing random pieces of wood into the pit, and got confused when Sofiane started freaking out) and sit around it telling scary stories and anecdotes of their journeys through puberty. 

Sofiane brings out his guitar and starts playing some tunes, and then the four of them are cuddling under one blanket. Eliott and Lucas are on the outsides though, and even if it’s just Arthur and Sofiane that separate them, Eliott feels like it’s an entire ocean. As the fire starts petering down, Sofiane stands up and yawns. “I’m slumped, so. Don’t stay up too late.” He turns and walks down the ways to the tent.

Eliott watches realization dawn on Arthur’s face. “Oh, me too,” he says as he stands up abruptly. “Sleep, that’s for me. ‘Night, guys.” He takes off in the direction Sofiane had just gone. 

Then there were two. Eliott and Lucas are still under the blanket, but there’s also still the length of two teenage boys between them.

Lucas says, “Which one of the elements do you identify the closest to?”

Eliott doesn’t miss a beat. “Fire. I think I am an absolute fireball. Pew, pew.” He mimes some fire bending, then stops abruptly when he sees Lucas’ unimpressed expression. He retracts his hands and clears his throat. “Um, what about you?”

“Water.” The light illuminating from the fire lights up the blue of Lucas’ eyes more than normal. “My emotions get the best of me sometimes.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Eliott tells him.

“No, it’s just annoying. I don’t know, at Penn’s it seems like everyone’s got this perfect life, like all their shit’s all put together.” 

Eliott frowns. “You know you can’t judge a book by its cover. It’s the oldest cliche in the book.”

Lucas rolls his eyes. “Well, yeah, but. No one at my school seems human. No one in this town seems human, for that matter. They’ve all got their picture perfect families, jetting off to Hawaii every summer and whatnot.”

“But their families could be full of conflict and behind the scenes arguments. Those families are capable of having imperfect lives too, you know.”

Lucas turns to meet his gaze. “What do you know? Your life is basically perfect too.”

“I never said it wasn’t.” He looks down and licks his lips. ”It’s not, by the way, my family has its fair share of problems too. But anger’s just gonna stem from that mindset, Lucas. No one gave you false information, you’re just assuming that everyone’s trying so hard to make themselves seem perfect to hide the terribleness in their lives. But maybe they’re just being themselves.”

Lucas hugs his knees closer to his body. “Maybe I’m just a really negative person. Maybe I’m just jealous because I can’t succeed in hiding the terribleness in my life as well as they do.”

Eliott hums, moves closer, and hugs the blanket tighter around him. “When I met you at the party, you were by far the coolest, most confident person I’d ever seen in my life.” He shrugs. “I still think you are, by the way.” 

Lucas turns his head away to hide in his arm, but when he turns back to the fire, Eliott can see that he’s smiling.

“You’ve got some pretty wise words for someone with such an awful winter coat.”

Eliott gapes as he clutches his brown coat tighter around his body. “Excuse me, this is fashion.”

Lucas laughs. “You’re excused, then.”

Eliott throws the blanket on Lucas and bursts out laughing as Lucas flails about. “Oh, fuck you, that wasn’t funny,” Lucas says, but Eliott can’t stop laughing and laughing and laughing, and he wishes he could spend the entire night and then the rest of eternity with this boy. 

-

He’s shaken awake in the middle of the night, and almost sits up before a body is pressing against his, hands gripping his sleeping bag. Warm lips clumsily press up against his hair, then move to his ear. “Come to my tent,” Lucas whispers, and Eliott is sitting up and moving so fast he sees stars. He takes his pillow. 

Lucas grips his shirt and leads him past the bonfire to his small sleeping area, crawls in with Eliott hot on his heels. Lucas lies down under his sleeping bag, then lifts the extra blanket as an invitation, one that Eliott gladly accepts. He lies down in front of him and they’re so close Eliott can feel Lucas’s breath on his own lips. 

Lucas is smirking. “You want me so bad,” he whispers. 

Eliott feels the color rising to his cheeks, and he hopes that it’s dark enough for Lucas not to notice. “Not true,” he replies.

“Oh shut it,” Lucas fires back. “You wanted me at the arcade, at the football game, at Denny’s, when I was in your house... you’ve wanted me all night.” 

Eliott smiles sheepishly. “Is it that obvious?”

Lucas shrugs. Eliott can’t see anything at all, so he chooses to focus on the presence of Lucas and the feeling of his breath. He’s in such a small space, so close to Lucas that it feels unreal. 

“Kiss me then,” Lucas says softly after a while, so quiet that Eliott almost misses it. He clutches the back of Lucas’ head and then moves his own forward to connect their lips. 

Both of them sigh into it as if they’d been anticipating this moment the entire night, or at least in Eliott’s case, since their first kiss at the party. It feels nothing short of right as their lips move together as one unit, as their tongues explore new areas. Eliott remembers how steamy their first kiss had been at the party, how it had been perfect. This kiss feels more intimate, more delicate, but it’s still just as perfect, if not more. 

The tent’s filled with the sound of shuffling and the rubbing of skin against a nylon sleeping bag as Eliott and Lucas find a rhythm in their making out. Eliott’s hands move from the back of Lucas’ head to down into the sleeping bag, where he finds the hem of Lucas’ shirt and hikes it up. Lucas lets him take his shirt off, and then he sits up to take off his own, rolling over so he’s on top of Lucas. Eliott bends down to connect their lips again and again, and with each connection there’s a new colored explosion behind his eyelids. There’s pools of warmth circling throughout his body, and the tent is burning, it’s burning up. 

He unzips the sleeping bag and sucks softly on Lucas’ collarbone, licking and sucking the same area repeatedly as he hears Lucas’ soft whimpers, whimpers he’s trying so desperately to conceal. He trails a line of kisses down the hard expanse of his stomach, making sure to let his hands touch every piece of skin he sees. Eliott grips his pajama pants and tugs them down. He ghosts his lips over the bulge in Lucas’s boxers, and then he’s mouthing at his dick over the soft cotton. Lucas is writhing under him, and he’s struggling more and more to keep the whimpers in. He feels Lucas’ hands at his hair, feels Lucas grab fistfuls of it and pull. It takes everything in him not to moan. 

Eliott pulls the boxers down and takes the length of Lucas into his mouth without any lead-up whatsoever. He hollows out his cheeks and moves up and down his length, stroking Lucas’s thighs and gripping the part his mouth can’t quite reach. Lucas shudders and comes in what seems like only a short amount of time, but Eliott likes to think it’s because of the magic of his mouth and not because Lucas is exhausted. He swallows, wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, and then pulls the sleeping bag up to cover Lucas once more. Eliott heaves his body back up to lazily tongue battle Lucas before Lucas is pulling away and saying, “And you, and you.”

Eliott laughs quietly. “Here.” 

Lying back down on his side, he uses the arm he’s on and reaches down into his pants to grasp his own shaft, and yeah, no surprise, he’s fully hard. He strokes himself a little before finding Lucas’s shoulder with the other hand and running his fingers down it to grab a hold of his hand. He leads the hand to the outside of his pants, hears the little catch in Lucas’s breath as he feels Eliott’s hand moving faster and faster. 

Eliott finishes all over his hand, with a low moan, and then Lucas is whispering, “Wipe it on the blanket, it’s okay, I don’t care,” before moving to catch Eliott’s lips with his own. And Eliott’s wiping his hand but he’s also clutching Lucas’s face and kissing him hard like he’s his last drop of oxygen, like he needs him to function. 

Eventually, the heat of the makeout session dies down, and then they’re just tiredly moving open mouths against each other’s lips. “You’re a really good kisser,” Eliott tells him.

“I know,” Lucas jabs back. 

Eliott smiles and pulls Lucas into his arms, kissing the top of his head. He remembers saying, “good night” before completely blacking out.

-

They wake up in the morning to Arthur and Sofiane bickering over the proper way to grill bacon, and seeing Lucas’s bed head first thing when he opens his eyes is something he could definitely get used to. They make out until Arthur unzips the door with a flourish and yells, “I’m happy you guys finally got some but could you please, please help us with breakfast?” 

The ride home is full of sing-alongs and laughs, and when Eliott drives, they make Lucas sit in the back because Sofiane’s scared of any distractions.

“I can’t believe you’ve found yourself a boy. I remember the day you were conceived,” Sofiane whispers to Lucas somberly, and when Eliott looks in the rear view mirror, it looks like there’s tears in his eyes. He meets Lucas’ eyes, who pulls a face. 

“Eliott, Lucas is fragile, fragile cargo. He’s absolutely treasured, Eliott. You can’t hurt him, oh God, the world would explode if he were to be sad.”

Arthur can barely sit still in the passenger seat because he’s struggling so hard to keep his laughs in. Lucas is sinking down in his own seat so low that Eliott can only see the top of his hair in the rearview mirror. 

“Now that you’re together and my status of the most important person in Lucas’ life is going to lower-“

“Shut up, stop being so dramatic-“ 

“I need you to understand that he really loves chocolate covered pretzels, and he can only sleep when it’s completely dark and completely silent, and he’s really good at the piano-“

“We’re not getting eloped, for Christ’s sake-“

“Eliott, pull over, I need you to start taking notes, Arthur, you drive.” 

Eliott taps the brakes and all three of the other boys scream, and well, it’s alright, because the rest of the ride home is spent in the backseat cuddling Lucas. He counts it as a win. 

-

Eliott goes to Lucas’ apartment for the first time two weeks or so later because his mom’s holding a gathering at his own and a storm is coming, so they can’t hang out outside. And they really want to hang.

The lead up to the hang-out is exhausting. Eliott finds himself constantly having to reassure Lucas that his own economic status doesn’t mean he expects the same glamour and luxury to grace everyone else’s life. He understands that he’s extremely privileged, and knows how to remain humble about the fact. Eliott constantly tells him that regardless of the size of his bedroom, he’s going to have fun with Lucas no matter what. 

“I’ll bring my laptop,” he’d said. “We can watch the rest of Stranger Things on your bed.” 

But they park in front of his complex and Eliott’s blood has been running cold ever since turning in. This isn’t a part of town that he graces often, for extremely valid reasons. There’s strung out old men lounging around on the planters a couple feet away, and Eliott unconsciously finds himself pressing his body to Lucas’ back, urging him to hurry up and lead the way. Lucas is sighing in annoyance as he turns the key. 

“They’re not gonna do anything, Eliott,” He tells him but Eliott is still terrified because this boy is emitting light that paints a neon red target on his back. Lucas is beautiful, and small, and vulnerable, and he wonders how he hasn’t gotten completely wrecked in this area of town before. There’s a sinking feeling in his stomach as he starts thinking about it more and more, taking his coat off in the apartment’s entryway. He looks around, takes in the cramped furniture, the musky smells, the darkness. Lucas doesn’t belong here. Lucas belongs in luxury, in million dollar mansions with hot tubs and massaging recliners. Lucas deserves to be spoiled, to be coddled and cared for and sheltered away from every single evil in the entire world. 

It should seem impractical and completely worrisome, the fact that Eliott is falling for this boy so fast. After the camping trip they’d been hanging out together close to almost every day, whether it be at the mall, at the arcade, Eliott’s house, or either one of their school’s. Eliott brings Lucas lunch sometimes, and they’ll sit down in the bed of his car and eat sandwiches and make out. Sofiane had come out to join them one time and then vowed to never come again, claiming that the PDA was so unnecessarily excessive that they belonged in an episode of Gossip Girl. And when Lucas had come to Eliott’s school one time, Arthur had sat with them and tried to film them, so. Lucas doesn’t come to Eliott’s school as much anymore. 

All in all, Eliott knows he’s the type to fall fast. In the kitchen, he leans on the counter and watches Lucas grab a pack of beers, takes in the overwhelming amount of bills on the counter, the dirty dishes in the sink and the mold on the bread on the table. Eliott falls in love with music, with art, with animals, with clothes. He cares so much and his heart is full with how much admiration he holds for the world. There’s so much beauty in everything. But Lucas. Lucas is the accumulation of the most alluring songs, the most dazzling art, the most fascinating animals and the most exquisite clothing. He’s stars in the night sky and flowers in fields, he’s magnetic and alluring and absolutely, absolutely lovely. He makes Eliott feel things he’s never felt before. So, he thinks that justifies the rush. Eliott isn’t cocky but he’s never been more confident of anything ever before in his life. 

Lucas tells Eliott that his mom’s at work. Eliott pretends to believe it. 

Lucas’ room sticks out from the rest of the apartment in that Eliott actually feels like he’s at home in it. And maybe it’s because the room is such an accurate depiction of who Lucas is. The polaroids on the wall of nature, animals, a lot of shots of Sofiane, some with Daphne, and four other girls that Eliott doesn’t recognize. The haphazardly made bed and the worn oak of the dresser, the glowing lava lamp in the corner and the comic books on the desk. It’s cozy and when Lucas sits between the V of Eliott’s legs on the bed, he pulls him in closer by the waist with a smile on his face so wide his cheeks hurt. 

When they’ve finished the last episode and are just making out lazily, lying down on his bed in the dark, the sounds of thunder seem to shake the bed. Eliott pulls away and caresses Lucas’s cheek. He has a million questions bumping around his brain, dying to find an answer for them, but he knows he shouldn’t push. In the intimacy of the moment, he whispers, “I would treat you like a king,” and it says everything but not enough at the same time. 

Lucas is silent, but in the dark when lightning flashes, Eliott can see his big baby blues searching his own. 

“I know you think I’m just some defenseless little kid, but I’ve lived in this kind of environment my entire life.” 

“Oh, Lucas.” He swallows to wet his dry mouth. “Of course, I know you take no one’s shit.” He pecks Lucas’ lips. “But you just... deserve so much more.”

“I’m just a normal guy, there’s child prodigies and geniuses out there who have it way worse.” 

Eliott runs his hands through Lucas’s locks and wishes he were capable of showing him what he sees. When he looks at Lucas, the world fades away.

“No, Lucas. Trust me. One day, I’ll prove to you how much you’re worth. As your boyfriend, I promise you this much.”

Lucas’ eyebrows shoot up. “Boyfriend? Is that what you are to me?”

Elliot laughs. “Sure, after you review the rules and regulations and make sure you initial in all seventeen places you have to on the contract…” 

He can feel Lucas’s eye roll. “Shut up, let’s just make out. You talk too much.”

“You’re only in this for my supreme kissing skills, huh?”

“Shut up and kiss me, boyfriend.”

Eliott can’t say no and he’s okay with never saying no for the rest of his life if it meant keeping this boy happy for all of eternity. 

-

Their first fight is bad, bad, bad. It’s bad because at this point they’re so emotionally invested in each other, so deep in love that they feel everything involving their relationship a bit too much, past the point of no return. 

It happens one day after school when Eliott is picking Lucas up. He’d had no more class after lunch, so he decided to run home and take a nap before coming back to take Lucas to a nearby music festival they’d been looking forward to for a while. Lucas was supposed to go with his sister, but she had apparently cancelled, so Lucas just sold the ticket to Eliott. Lucas never told Eliott why his sister cancelled, especially because she’s like 10 and probably doesn’t have the most full itinerary, but Eliott didn’t push it.

However, Eliott slept right through his alarm and was now pulling up to school a good forty minutes late. He sees Lucas sitting on the curb in a completely empty parking lot, on his phone, and when he hears the car approach, he shoots up quickly. 

He reaches across the center console to open the passenger door for Lucas, and winces when he sees his pissed off look. 

“I’m really sorry, I went home and took a nap and I guess my alarm didn’t go off-“

“The Wallows just finished performing,” Lucas cuts him off sourly and crosses his arms. “We missed them.”

Eliott turns the engine off. “That’s okay,” he replies, turning to angle his body towards Lucas completely. “There’s still more great, amazing artists we can see, if we just leave right now-“

“No, Eliott, because I paid a hundred dollars and we’ve missed my favorite band, so what’s the fucking point?”

Eliott blinks. “Baby, it’s cool. I can pay you back, we don’t have to waste our tickets-“

“No, Eliott, I don’t want your money!” Lucas explodes. “It took me a really long time to save up that much! It might not be that much to you, okay, but I worked hard and I earned it myself and I wanted to use it on myself, and now I fucking can’t.” 

“How did you earn it?” Eliott inquires. “You never told me.”

“It doesn’t matter.” 

Eliott sighs. “Lucas, it does, it matters to me.”

Lucas says, “I wish this fucking music festival mattered to you as much as it did to me, but obviously, it didn’t!” 

Eliott’s so tired. He loves Lucas so much, but Lucas hides things from him. Eliott’s an open book, and at this point he would say that Lucas knows more about him than he knows about himself. But, Lucas. It’s been months and he’s never met Lucas’s family. He doesn’t know anything about Lucas’s sister except her name and how old she is. He doesn’t know why she’s never around or why she doesn’t seem to have a room at Lucas’s apartment. Lucas hasn’t mentioned anything about being a foster kid, about what he does when he’s not with Eliott or Sofiane or even Arthur, about why he sometimes shows up to Eliott’s house unannounced with tears in his eyes. Lucas hides so much from Eliott, and Eliott doesn’t know why. He wants to help the boy so much, wants to ease his pain, but Lucas brushes every offer away and time and time again rejects his help. 

And maybe it’s because he’s cranky he woke up from a nap immediately panicked, or maybe it’s because he’s so thrown off by the unfamiliar, hostile tone of Lucas’ voice. Whatever it is, Eliott explodes right back. 

“For once in your fucking life, could you maybe not act like you’re so above everyone else? Like you never make mistakes? Cut it out with all the defensive, angsty, “I’m not like other teenage boys” bullshit and behave like a normal, decent human being for once.” 

It’s not about the music festival anymore. 

“Like you’re so high and mighty and perfect yourself, Eliott? Acting like you’re this amazing angel in every scenario ever, like you always know the right thing to do, because you’re so damn rich? Like you always have the perfect thing to say, like no one ever has a problem with you?”

“I’m your boyfriend, Lucas! Not an object you can use whenever you feel like it suits your mood the best! You’re supposed to tell me things, and I feel like I hardly know anything about you!”

“Maybe if you weren’t so fucking nosy all the time, it’d be easier to tell you things! You’re so suffocating sometimes! Maybe if you didn’t think you were so privileged, so entitled! News flash, Eliott! Not everyone gets everything they ever want! My life is my own!” 

“Oh, ladies and gentlemen, there it is again! You know, maybe your sister cancelled not because she wasn’t able to come, but because she just couldn’t fucking stand your negativity- or maybe just you in general!“

Silence. Eliott regrets it as soon as it leaves his mouth. 

“Lucas-“

“Oh, fuck you, that was a low blow.”

Lucas is biting his lip, but his hands are shaking and his eyes are tearing up and he looks so, so angry. “Fuck you, Eliott,” he says again lowly. Then he’s opening the car and jumping out. “I’m fucking walking home, don’t even think about following me.”

Eliott watches him go, then slams his hand against the dashboard and stays in his car as the weight of his words come back to slap him in the face. 

-

He’s at Lucas’s apartment with flowers two nights later. He knocks at the apartment door until his knuckles hurt, calling Lucas’s name relentlessly. Eliott knows he can hear him. 

“I’m sitting here until you come out and talk to me. If you don’t come out I’m asking the landlord for the key, and I’ll say it’s an emergency.”

He’s just sunk down on the welcome mat when the door whips open, and he jumps to his feet immediately, shoving the bouquet towards Lucas. Lucas, who’s wearing sweats and an oversized sweater, bags under his eyes and hair that gives off an “unshowered for longer than is considered decent” vibe. Despite his struggle and protests, Eliott pulls him in for a hug and holds him until Lucas stops fighting.

“I’m pissed off at you,” Lucas says, and Eliott nods, forcing his way into the apartment.

“Yeah, I know. So I’m taking you somewhere, stuff we need’s already in the truck.”

“And why should I go with you?” Lucas asks defiantly.

Eliott gives him a look. Lucas follows him out the door angrily.

“You have a truck?” Lucas asks. 

Elliot answers, “It’s my dad’s. He’s in Ibiza right now,” to which Lucas doesn’t reply.

In the truck pulling out of the parking lot, with Lucas slouched down and arms crossed over his chest, Eliott starts, “There’s an asshole in the senior year who slept through his alarm and missed the opportunity to make a sad boy extremely happy by taking him to see his favorite band in the entire universe.” 

Lucas looks out the window, but Eliott knows he’s listening.

“That asshole said some pretty hurtful things that can’t be justified in any way. That asshole had no right mentioning anything about this sad boy’s sister. He made some low blows that no one deserves to hear. Look at me, Lucas.”

Lucas grumbles, “No, you should be looking at the road,” and Eliott rolls his eyes.

“That asshole is me, if you didn’t figure it out yet. And I’m really, really sorry. For making you miss the band and for all the shit I said. I said it in the moment and I regret all of it.”

A pause. He puts his hand palm up on the center console and looks over at Lucas. It’s a couple minutes later, but Lucas grabs it and entwines their fingers eventually.

“I wish you trusted me more, Lucas, because I would trust you with my life.” 

Lucas is quiet as they drive uphill, and then they’re turning a corner into a secluded nature-made tunnel, emerging out on the other side to an opening on the hill of a gorgeous view of the city. Lucas’s eyes widen and he sits up, soaking in the sight. Eliott turns the truck around, then turns off the engine. 

He gets out and makes his way to the truck bed, grabbing the blankets and laying them out along its bottom.

Eliott hops onto the truck bed on the blankets and looks at Lucas still standing in front of him, surveying the city.

“I’m sorry for the shit I said too.” Elliot hears Lucas apologize quietly and he takes it as a victory.

Eventually Lucas is making his way onto the bed, and they’re sitting against the back with some space between them. The tension is thick and Eliott just wants to grab Lucas and hold him tight.

Lucas takes a deep, deep, deep breath and Eliott turns to look at his side profile. 

“Do you... remember when you saw me at the arcade? With my sister? That you brought up?”

Eliott winces and motions for him to go on.

“She is my little sister, but... she doesn’t live with me.” Eliott watches Lucas take another deep breath, his eyes fixated on the way the lights of the city don’t even begin to compare with the glow emitting from his skin. “She lives with my grandma, way down South. My grandma could only afford to take one of us in. Obviously, I volunteered for my sister to go. It was really, really hard for the both of us. I rarely get to see her because the commute up here isn’t exactly cheap.”

Eliott doesn’t say anything because he knows that in this moment, Lucas is finally laying his heart and soul down on the line, exposing himself to Eliott in the most delicate way, and Eliott knows that he needs to handle this situation carefully. He needs to make it clear that he’s listening, that he’ll accept whatever Lucas has to offer him. 

Lucas takes a shaky breath, scoots closer to Eliott and tentatively lays his head on his shoulder. Both of Eliott’s arms come to encircle his small figure, and he runs a hand up and down his arm, tracing shapeless patterns into the soft cotton of his sweater.

“My dad’s in jail. For theft, or something, I don’t know, he’ll be in there until I’m like forty. And my mom...” He trails off. Looks down. Wipes teary eyes with a shaky hand. 

“Um, we used to live in Florida. My mom was always really depressed. I think it had to do with my dad mostly, how he’d be out getting into fights and drinking. She hated her life. I could never tell what she thought of Lucy and I. We were on our own most of the time. She’d stay in bed for weeks at a time, and I’d forget what she looked like. 

“When I was thirteen she came out of her room all dressed up, her hair and makeup done. Lucy and I thought this was it, that she finally wanted... to be a mom, basically. We thought she was gonna leave our dad.”

“Um, she took us to the park that day. She let us go play with the ducks and said she’d catch up. Then... she.... she, um...”

Lucas takes a shaky breath. 

“She locked herself in the car and drove into the lake.”

Eliott’s hands falter on the sweater material of the other boy’s clothing. Lucas sniffs and doesn’t move, and Eliott lets him cry silently. He rests his chin on top of his head, his arms tightening around Lucas, and his heart shatters. He wants to protect this boy from all the evils of the world, but one of the most evil events in his life has already happened. And Eliott wasn’t there to do anything about it. 

“That’s how I met Sofiane,” Lucas continues through the tears. “We were in foster care together, because my dad literally went to jail right after my mom died. He wasn’t allowed at the funeral, and I... I don’t remember what he looks like either. With Sofiane, the only difference was that two dentists adopted him and I‘ve been in four foster homes. Now I’m living in that apartment with this lady, Georgia. She’s... she’s never at the apartment. She admitted to me like four times that she’s doing it for the cash. She deals, and she’s clubbing more often than not,” Lucas mumbles. “I use my neighbor Elizabeth’s wifi for Instagram, to DM you. That’s why I said I had limited phone usage.” 

Eliott takes all of it in for a couple of minutes. They have to sit in silence because what he’s just learned about this beautiful boy is so immense that it hurts him. He’s at a loss for words for a really long time.

Then, he starts, “I’m...” but Lucas cuts him off with a kiss so desperate that he nearly topples over. He’s roughly pushed into the side of the truck bed as Lucas practically climbs over him, kissing him again and again, harder and harder. 

“No, don’t apologize, please, I can’t take it,” Lucas breathes between kisses. Eliott smooths his hands against Lucas’ sides and tries to get him to slow down, but Lucas is absolutely relentless and Eliott is too weak to turn such a beautiful boy away.

“I just want you to make it go away,” Lucas whispers. “Just make it stop hurting, make me feel good.”

In the truck bed, under the blankets with only the piercing gaze of the stars above them as witness and the illuminating lights of the city below them to accompany them, Eliott doesn’t say anything about the tears on Lucas’ face as they undress, as he lays Lucas down, as he breaks the threshold that separates them and pushes into Lucas slowly. 

Lucas whines for him to go faster, scratches down his back and begs for it in such a filthy way, but Eliott can’t, Eliott won’t. He goes as slow as possible, trying to drag out this moment for as long as he can. He uses one arm to brace himself above Lucas and the other to cradle his face, using his thumb to wipe the tears away, to keep Lucas on Earth, on the same plane he’s on. He bends down on a thrust to kiss Lucas, and as he pulls back, rests his forehead against the other’s, peers into vulnerable, open blue eyes, he says, “I love you.”

And then he’s repeating it like a mantra with every thrust, but Lucas is so far gone and he doesn’t know how to get him back. “I love you, Lucas, I love you, I love you.” 

Lucas is crying and crying and when they both finish, not long after one another, Lucas immediately pulls Eliott down on top of him and tightens his arms around him, as though he’s trying to pull him impossibly closer, as if he’s trying to merge their bodies into one.

Eliott forcibly shifts them so he’s on his side, and then Lucas is curling into his chest as Eliott pulls the blankets over them and wraps a heavy arm around him, pulling Lucas impossibly closer to him. He stays awake as Lucas’ breathing evens out, rocking him back and forth, stroking his hair softly, trying to soothe the boy as much as he can. 

Eliott knows Lucas is emotionally exhausted. He’s stripped himself bare for Eliott, literally and figuratively and now it feels as if Eliott can understand the workings of his brain so much better, why he’s so secretive, why he’s always so scared. He thinks of how much of Lucas’ life he’s seen in the past months, thinks of how much a boy that absolutely radiates sunshine and cares for everyone and everything absolutely doesn’t deserve to live in such cruel conditions. He thinks about how he’s so emotionally attached and invested in Lucas now that if anything bad were to happen to him, he’d also feel it himself, but on a scale magnified by a hundred times more.

He kisses the top of Lucas’ head and tries to sleep, but the thoughts keep swirling around in his head, until, finally.

A lightbulb.

-

Lucas is silent on the ride home. Eliott had woken up to Lucas’ sad eyes and careful fingers running along the slope of his eyebrow. Eliott had given him a careful, reassuring smile, and much to his surprise, had gotten a watery one in return. Eliott knows he’s gonna be okay.

“I know you’re probably sad I didn’t say it back,” Lucas starts as the truck reaches the bottom of the hill, but Eliott is quick to cut him off.

“You’re not allowed at all to feel guilty right now. You say whatever you want to me whenever you want to, and I’ll never judge.” 

Lucas smiles down at his lap.

“Hey,” Eliott says, and Lucas finally meets his eyes. 

“You deserve to be smiling all the time.” He turns back to the road. “And you’re incredibly brave for telling me what you did last night.” Looks back at Lucas. “I’m really, really proud of you. Thank you for letting me in.”

Lucas is shyly looking out the window. “No big deal,” he mumbles, and Eliott scoffs.

“Don’t belittle your accomplishments like that, okay? It takes guts to tell your boyfriend your life story. I’m proud of you. And you deserve to feel proud of yourself.” 

“Eliott, I’m really sorry it took so long. I’ve… never opened up like that to anyone, not even Sofiane. No more secrets between us. I trust you with my life.” 

Eliott smiles. He grips Lucas’ thigh with his free hand and gives it a squeeze, and when Lucas’ own hand comes up to clasp his, fingers tangled together and fitting together like a puzzle, Eliott knows they’re going to be okay.

-

FOUR MONTHS LATER 

“Oh, it just got really cold.”

“Yeah, well. We’re in a building now. Stop here.”

“Why?”

“We’re waiting.”

“For what? Oh, shit, that was an elevator ding... Oh, we’re going up. Are you still there?”

“Yeah, you can still feel my hands, Lucas.”

“I don’t know, you’re scaring me. Oh wow, we’ve been going up for a really long time.”

“Hm. Okay, step over, now! No, now, there, there!”

“Stop laughing! Holy crap, you’re moving your hands so much. You’re making me do stunts, ow, ow.”

“Okay, stop.”

“I can open my eyes now?”

“Yep. Ready?”

Eliott slowly lifts his hands from Lucas’ eyes. “Tada,” he says.

They stare at the white double doors in front of them. Lucas surveys his surroundings, sees the elevator behind them, the entryway area that they’re in. He looks up at the huge doors.

“Are we robbing someone?” He asks, and Eliott scoffs and digs into his pocket, pulling out the key. He steps around Lucas, unlocks the door, and opens it with a flourish.

“Holy shit.”

Lucas’ mouth is wide open, his eyes shifting, unable to focus on one thing at a time. They walk through the front door into the living room. Lucas takes in the white marble floors, the floor length windows, the openness of the floor plan and just how huge the area is. He follows Lucas quietly as he makes his way around the area, into the kitchen, the hallways, peeking into the bedrooms and expressing his disbelief through exclamations at every new area. He makes his way back into the living room and stands in the middle, staring out the floor-length window, and the view of the city below them.

“This is a penthouse,” he states, completely dumbfounded. 

“Really great observation, Lucas,” Eliott teases, coming up behind him to rub at his shoulders. Lucas reaches up to grab his hands, then turns around and holds them between them.

“How long are we staying here?” Lucas whispers.

Eliott takes a breath. “Hopefully forever.”

Confusion embraces Lucas’s features before realization dawns on him. “Oh, no. No, no, no, tell me you didn’t.”

Eliott shrugs. “I think I did.”

Lucas drops Eliott’s hands and backs up slowly, looking wildly around their surroundings again. “How much was this?”

“Don’t worry about it.” He bites his lip and smiles. “I’m eighteen now.”

He watches as Lucas’ hands come up to cover his mouth, then drop. He repeats the action about twelve times. “You’re not saying what I think you’re saying.”

“I think I just said what you think I’m saying that you don’t want me to say.”

Wide vulnerable eyes stare back at him. “And Georgia?”

“She admitted herself to rehab this morning. We’ve actually been talking a lot, surprise.” Lucas’s eyes widen but Eliott barrels through. “We can swing by and say bye to her, and we’re gonna have to stop by the apartment to pack up your things anyways. She said she wants to donate all that stuff anyways, so anything you don’t need will go to the child geniuses and prodigies that have it worse than you do.”

He crosses the room and cups a dumbstruck Lucas’ face in his hands. “I want you to live here with me, no worries in the world. You’d be treated like the king you are, treated exactly the way you should be.” 

Tears are welling up in Lucas’ eyes, and Eliott can’t help but laugh. “Oh, baby, don’t.”

Lucas is gaping. “I can’t accept this. Holy shit, this is too much.”

Eliott huffs, moves his hands down to Lucas’ shoulders and shakes him. He looks deep, deep into his eyes and smiles. He remembers the night they met at the party, how the range of possibilities had opened up and showcased a whole new world to him, one of excitement, of adventure, of love. He remembers where they started, where they came from, and is so overwhelmed with how much they’ve grown that he has to lean forward and rest his forehead against Lucas’s.

“All your life you have been expected to look out for yourself and only yourself. You’ve never had anyone else to call your own, and all the problems you’ve faced in your life, you’ve had to shoulder their immense weight all on your own. I’m sick of the expectation of the future you’ve painted for yourself, one where you live in isolation for the rest of your life because your pride is the blockade that prevents you from accepting a gift presented to you by someone who loves you so much. I absolutely adore everything about you, Lucas, and I want you to move in with me, into this penthouse that my family owns and has given to me for college. I’ll be taking classes online, and the community college is only a five minute walk away for you.”

He presses a kiss to Lucas’s lips softly then pulls away and smiles. “I’m crazy for you. Crazy enough to be your legal guardian for four months.”

And now tears are rolling down Lucas’s face but he’s smiling so, so wide. His entire face is lit up, and Eliott is so confident in how far he’s willing to go to keep that smile on his face. 

“Breakfast in bed every morning?” Lucas asks.

“Check.”

“Back massages whenever I want them?”

“Check.”

“Constant love, support, and motivation whenever I’m feeling down?”

“Check, check, check.”

“Eliott?” Lucas bunches the front material of his shirt into the balls of his hand, looking up at him with admiration and extreme vulnerability.

“Lucas.”

Lucas smiles. “I love you. I love you so, so much.”

And then they’re kissing, and as they make love on the floor of their new bedroom in their new penthouse for the first time, it’s magical and it’s beautiful. Eliott knows the rest of his life will be as well, as long as he’s got this ocean-eyed boy by his side for all of it.


End file.
